Very important trouser announcement

Many of you have messaged me privately to express sleepless concern about my trouser arrangements for my dinner at V&A.

You will — of course — remember that I went chino shopping last week and was horrified to discover that the posh English shop (Cordings) I went to literally had nothing that fit.

Well today I went to Orvis — an American chain — and found the perfect chinos. Not only did they fit, they were marked as 40-inch waist. The same alleged size at Cordings was too small.

I’m delighted because (a) this proves that I am actually thin after all and (b) the chinos are smart enough to pair with a blazer for dinner, but casual enough to be comfortable to wear on the plane, thus meaning I won’t have to pack them.

The trousers are currently being altered for length, but photographs will be published in due course.


Excellent news, and we can now all finally get some sleep.


Well, I have always wondered what Daniel Craig looked like in chinos.

This is why, in America at least, you can never just buy clothes based on the size. One clothier’s 32 is another clothier’s 34 is another’s 30. And it is worse for women.

Anyhow, I’m glad to finally be able to get some much needed sleep.


It’s no different in the UK. Sometimes even within the same shop you’re a different size. So annoying!


This is why I quit worrying about what the tag said and started paying more attention to how my body looked. Sure, I could get a size 10 to button but who wants to see the exaggerated amount of muffin top hanging over my belt!


Oh, no! You’re joining the madness, too?!?! :roll_eyes:


You hang around here long enough, and the madness spreads. It is contagious, I guess. Achoo


Yeah, I can usually tell just by looking at something if it will fit, I start with my size and go up or down as required.



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When you post the pictures, can you please include Calvin in them? I kind of have a crush on him.


Phew! I can sleep better now.


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Mmmmmm, muffins…

Oh dear. That’s what has made my clothes shrink. Why do I have functioning taste buds???


Nice one!

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Personally, I blame the medical profession. Why have they never warned us about the link between hugely fattening food and increased waist size? It’s a scandal. We should bring a class-action law suit.

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You have a point. They are so focused with the heart, they neglected to inform anyone about the waist. I mean, who CARES what the HEART looks like? No one will ever see it except your cardiologist anyway!


All physicians are fanatical busy-bodies, sticking their noses into other people’s business.

Hmm. Of all the doctors I’ve ever had, they may stick things into my business, but never their noses. I’d seriously consider looking for a different doctor!


So this means 10 courses at V&A, right? :wink:

I’ve invited my physician and my accountant for an emergency meeting to discuss the issue.