Update -- Grandparent Limits?

LOL @ “snailneck speed” :joy: :joy: :joy:

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Love this. We were JUST talking about skipping town for Thanksgiving or Christmas next year just to avoid dealing with the stress of all the family plans on both sides!

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Yeah I may have opened a can of worms in my reply that could turn this thread in a whole new direction lol…

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UPDATE – so I invited them and they said no after thinking on it for a few days. I am good with that. I think they were a bit turned off by the offer in general (late in there planning stages as the trip is in January, only 3 days, and we were not paying for it) but they were relatively gracious. i get it but it was all I could offer and be fair to my family and DH. and I did take alot of advice from you all and offer the trip with only the caviat that it would be 3 days ( i figured if they said yes we could get into the details later) but since they didn’t they have no idea of the rules. Phew. I think we dodged a bullet.

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As my mother would say, all’s well that ends well!

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Great topic. I think this just comes down to your family dynamics.

I am so sorry to hear all these stories, we ALWAYS travel with my parents. Wouldn’t even think of going without them. We like double teaming the kids, just makes things so much easier, but we obviously have a different dynamic :slight_smile:
We are going for a week in March without them and I am terrified!

Terrified?

Yeah, a bit extreme. Worried is better :slight_smile:

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My parents go along with my plans and are on my side, my husband is a bit more strong willed so it’s tougher to get my way when I don’t have more people on my side :slight_smile:

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happy wife = happy life

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I know that you have already made your decision, but I would like to put in a word that might help other people - as a Grandparent.

We have gone twice with kids and grandkids. Many years ago (before ADRs and Fast Pass Plus, etc) my daughter mentioned to me that they were taking their 3 kids to WDW and if we would like to join them they would enjoy that. We got our own room in the same Resort, bought our own tickets, paid for our own meals etc. We only could come for a long weekend, so we spent 3 days.

We bought the kids 1 gift each, period. We went along with everything that they all wanted to do. If we didn’t want to wait in line for a particular attraction, we just wandered around close by and met them at the exit. No biggie.

And - last year we took my DS, DIL and Granddaughter to WDW for a week. We were paying for everything. I planned the entire trip, getting input from them such as which characters to have meals with, attractions to make sure and include, etc).

Things went quite smoothly. My son can talk candidly to me and he said they had a great time. The only thing they would have changed was the weather (it was a bit colder than they anticipated). We had separate rooms next door to each other (so we could catch the bus together each morning). As far as keeping up, you should know your parents fitness level. We did take a couple of breaks to do “our own thing” but basically were together most of the trip. Hubby and I (in our early 70s) wore the three of them out! They had to go back to the hotel and rest one day, while we stayed at the park.

Just a little different perspective from a Grandparent. However I am l looking forward to our four day trip in March for just the two of us!

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My parents joined us on our most recent trip. It was a trip that we were planning for ourselves, but they hadn’t been in a while so were expressing some interest in going. I was up front with them from the beginning. I think it went something like this…

"This is our trip and we are going to be busy. You are welcome to come if you want, and do as much or as little with us as you want, but don’t expect us to slow down for you. "

We booked some meals together and some fastpasses. Outside of that, it was mostly doing our own thing and it went pretty well. It is hard to give blanket advice on a topic like this though. There are a lot of variables at play. Relationship with parents, how comfortable they are in the parks without you… stuff like that. My parents had been by themselves before so it wasn’t an issue. It was basically like we were on two separate vacations that overlapped at times. Everyone had great time and it was fun to catch up at the end of the day or at meals and see what others had been doing.

One rule that I did put into place from a past experience with my wife’s brother and his family is that there is no waiting for people at a bus stop. If the bus to the park is there, get on it. Missing a bus and waiting for the next one never starts a day out well.

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It really is so interesting hearing everyone’s different perspective on this!!! Because just as you said you’d never think of going without them, I’d never consider going WITH mine again, lol! As you said, just a different dynamic, no right or wrong way.
We just don’t even have the desire to invite them along again or consider a together trip if they suggested it. We treasure the time we have together, just the four of us on our Disney trips, I honestly think that’s one of our favorite things about it.

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Great advice!

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This is honestly how we should have set expectations for the trip my parents joined us for. They had no WDW planning experience so wanted me to do everything, but didn’t really want to have a “plan”. They also are not as into many of the same things we are. We did slow down for them at times and I think it caused a lot of tension because we weren’t moving at the pace we were used to, we were probably irritable and resentful because of it and they were just moving at a snail’s pace looking around with a “what to do now” type of attitude. We decided a few days in that we were not responsible for their fun and ends up separating more (especially after the blowup, lol…).

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If you feel you have to have rules - you pretty much know you will have issues.

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Agreed!

Disagree. I think I put just a couple rules in place because I identified where there could be issues. By addressing them ahead of time, it made it less likely for them to become an issue. Our trip went perfectly, never had any issues with my parents, and they didn’t have any issues that they told me about. I think the things we talked about before hand helped set the proper expectations and lead to a great trip.

That is probably the biggest thing I have found about Disney trips anyways…managing expectations. If people don’t know what to expect from a WDW trip, they tend to be let down.

I think this once again comes down to your own family dynamics. If you have a laundry list of rules and regulations - you WILL most certainly have an issues. If your rules are simple and the people they are being imposed upon are receptive to them - that is certainly a different story.

Point being - you need to know your audience and if they come back with “I don’t want to follow a plan” or “I don’t want to waste my time doing X” - you will have issues.

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