Help, Save Me. THEY ARE COMING *conflicting trip report

The gays are coming! The gays are coming!

Well, not just any. It’s @mousematt and his gaggle of gays (as I’ve taken to calling them)

Oh sod it, I’m absurdly excited and I might just try to post a conflicting trip report to annoy him.

Should I? SHOULD I?!

I fly out Sunday for an undetermined time, my first trip anywhere since we got back from Europe (spoiler: I’m still tired and I think I’m dying. Matt said I’m not allowed to die until I give him his Christmas present on the 17th…)

All I know, I have the treats for them. I’m not seeing them until Wednesday……

At least that’s what they think….

And now he’s gonna come scream at me.

twirls and giggles

But he needs to be nice or I won’t let him see all it fancy new handbags LOL

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Heck yes!

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You are nothing and no-one at UOR. I am a Premier Annual Passholder. If I see you on property, I will have you removed.

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Oh heavens. Is that all I need, to buy a measly little “premier” pass?

I have a fancy metal card that enables me to buy a CAR with it now, so ITS ON.

Or not.

Because I am going to need to sleep on Monday because I’m pretty sure I’m dying.

So yeah

Oh and I’m going to meet some disney guy on Monday, maybe I’ll have him sign a book for you?

IF YOU BEHAVE.

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You don’t need a car. You’ve already got one. I mean, it’s old and trashy (much like its owner) but it works (oddly unlike its owner).

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I beg to differ, with that fancy paint job the beast looks pretty good for being 19 years old!

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Something else it doesn’t have in common with you.

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I’m so glad I’m not 19 anymore.

It enables me to have grown up money to buy grown up things.

Like your Christmas present

Which I am now regretting the fact that I didn’t just bring it over in October because I had plenty of open suitcase space on our trip over….

It needs a bow. Yes?

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Obviously.

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I am going to need to take off work to follow both trip reports but I love a good @mousematt and @JuliaMc meet up.

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There are a few things you can count on when we are together:

  1. There will be snark and many insults

  2. I’ll have on a dress and he will hate me because I’m cuter than him

  3. He will wear something strange and claim “but I’m British” and manage to get away with it

  4. Teddy Bears will be involved.

  5. He will keep insisting I’m going to meet his relatives and then there’s ALWAYS an excuse. I’m still quite miffed I didn’t get to meet the King when I was in London, he PROMISED. Sigh. These Brit’s are so untrustworthy. I’ll give them a pass because their scones are delightful

It’s just a given.

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I knew you would have beautifully made crackers for them even before I saw the photo. I am disappointed to see there are only four because we need @JuliaMc to report on the Christmas dinner.

Oh, and since this is her report and @mousematt can’t ban me: even this report is prettier than his with those cookies and that present photo.

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  1. You will have better shoes.
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Erm, I will be rocking two new pairs of shoes, including my Jordans. Her “Louboutins” (she buys generic and paints the soles red) have nothing on those bad boys.

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Indeed they will. I counsel you to be cautious. I wasn’t joking.

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Oh don’t worry. That photo doesn’t reveal everything, and I have a few tricks up my sleeve.

I AM going to the Christmas dinner! Even if I just sit at the bar and take photos from a distance. Don’t worry, @mousematt is used to paparazzi, I hope one day he comes clean about his TRUE identity.

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I actually have two new pairs of shoes for this trip too! Sandals! I bought a pair of Louis Vuitton I’m going to break in, and then a new pair of Louboutin sandals to go with my new Asprey bag you already hate.

Neither pair is sparkly, which is weird, but sometimes a girl has to change things up.

Hopefully I get there. It’s been a rough morning in my house. Someone is crabby. (Not me)

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Is it Arlowe?

He’s one of several who are crabby.

I’m also crabby right now because I stupidly bought a peloton a year ago and my husband said I wouldn’t be consistent, and as such, I am in the middle of some horrifying sweaty ride to PROVE HIM WRONG.

LOL

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Way to go! That’s almost as lovely as @mousematt ’s compliments!

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